Society has placed so much emphasis on first love, almost to the point of obsession with the idea. In movies, girl meets boy, falls in love, and then live happily ever after in a short amount of time. We continue to see characters fall deeply in love and it seems the first love should also be your only. Believing your first love should be or is your best love is wrong. While your first love may be the first, there is a great deal to be said about love the second time around. While this does not mean that if you are still with your first love you were not meant to be, some are, but not all. Many people are unable to claim that their first loves were the best. It is rare today to have a first relationship be lasting and the only one. This means for the majority; your first love is rarely your last.
Admittedly, there are legitimate reasons why people seem obsessed with first loves. This is not about the middle school crush type of love, but the first love that steals your breath, turns your world upside down, and knocks you off balance. You may swear in that moment that you will never again feel the same way. Falling in love for the first time is a unique feeling to be sure. Everything experienced is indescribable and brand new. The first love will sweep you off your feet and you will fall for one another in every sense. You will want to spend all your free time together and when physically apart, you will think of little else other than your first love. First loves are passionate, crazy, and make you feel totally alive. You forget your life prior to meeting that person and cannot imagine life without having them right by your side. This is not limited to your first relationship because that may not be your first love. You may date and be in several relationships and think it is love, until you meet your first love and you simply know it’s real.
When a first love comes to an end, the pain is indescribable, just as the relationship once was. It hurts, no matter how it ended. What hurts the most is you cannot ever imagine feeling the same way again. How could you ever get those feelings back? When this first love ends, it is almost impossible to believe you can have the same feelings again with someone new. This was and always will be your first love. Though it was your first, it need not be your last. It came to an end for a reason and it is important to remember that whatever the reason, you are not meant to be. Once you make this realization, you will be in a healthier mindset. Still, the fear of never finding love again will nag at you. Below, we can explore how the ending of the first love can be the best thing that ever happened.
Give some credit to the second love because it is better than the first in many ways. A first love is full of the unexpected and it can take us by surprise, even be scary at times because we never know what is to come. The feelings can become overwhelming. The pain of the first love can be extreme as well. By comparison, the second love is just as exhilarating, but you can anticipate what is to come. You can remain calmer, but still enjoy the rush of being in love. Even if you swear you will never find love again, second love has a way of changing your mind.
The destruction of your first love will change you as a person and while you may be bitter a while, you will eventually be better. The bitterness ebbs when you find love once again because your first love taught you so much. You will grow from the loss and change for the better in a new relationship. Second love brings rationality because you are older, better, and wiser. You are more aware of yourself and know what you want in a relationship. A second love can do things for you that a first never did and you may actually enjoy it.
Being in love again is not boring, just a bit calmer. You can realize it is possible to feel everything again, but on an even deeper level. Let yourself fall in love a second time and watch as your love flows stronger than you ever imagined. Love really is better the second time around.